Read all about it To quote one of my favorite lines from the Sopranos (it's a scene where Janice, forced into anger management classes when she beats the crap out of a soccer mom, starts a fight with a black lady in the same class and a brown-clad UPS guy also in the class says "This is fucking priceless." The scene, alas, is truly priceless as well). The Frogs and Krauts with their newly-found balls have triggered worldwide protests, threats of kidnappings, and no doubt violence, all because they printed that silly cartoon of Muhommad. I LOVE it. It shows those degenerate, dark-age monsters for what they are. So locked in the insanity of their own religion they're willing to destroy real human beings for decidedly small infractions against the same said religion. Do those muslim boobs have any brains at all or are they just really just little coyotes wandering around in packs killing every other little mammal for the slightest pinky claw step into their wild territories? If they're not, they should fucking stop acting like they are.
I really hate movie stars, this site has a Movie Star Pig Fucker category after all. Unless a star hits that category, I could care less about them. They're communists, stupid, self-righteous, and uninteresting parrots with nothing new to say about anything.
But I couldn't help myself here. Lindsay Lohan, one of the ugliest It-Girls ever, has been in another accident. In fact, she's been in a lot of accidents. This time, she "slipped" down the stairs of fellow nobody Bryan Adams (anyone remember who that is?!) and sliced herself with a teacup, of all things. I say slice, cnn.com says "cut." If you have to go to a hospital for treatment rather than peel open a bandaid, you're sliced. She's also been in two car accidents where she's the driver. I realize she may be passing drug/alcohol tests at the time, but every good drunkard knows that mental impairment can last long after the BAC dwindles, depending on the bender. I shall wait for the "rehab" headlines as undoubtedly, she's headed there. She's got bucks to buy all the substances she could possible swallow, and so she's got three options: Get some treatment, join Michael Jackson in the Bahrain insane assylum, or join Chris Farley et al six feet under.
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Read all about it French and German newspapers have published cariacatures of Muhammad to the disgust of the Muslim world. Their tag lines stated that "democratic freedoms include the right to blasphemy." MWB couldn't agree more but wow. From the fagola French and krazy Krauts, who'd a thunk it.
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Well, probably not. But if you have a few minutes to spare, this is such a heartwarming story. The synopsis is that a woman saw a little girl alone in a convenience store who looked haunted, scared, something; the woman's instincts told her something was wrong. She took the license plate of of the creepy dude who drove the girl away, called 911, then local authorities, and even America's Most Wanted. When they did nothing, she drove 300 miles back to the convenience store a week later and begged them to let her watch the surveillance tape from the day she saw the girl. While watching the tape, a local cop walks in, he's pursuaded to look into it further, and voila, the girl was not supposed to be with the cretins who were keeping her, the creepy dude was a convicted child molester and they were molesting her, and the child has been saved.
I love this story, and I have to keep the dark reality cloud away that this poor child has been saved for the moment but most certainly has a real tough life ahead of her. The next invention should be the ability to wipe out horrifying childhood memories, I tell ya'.
And while we're at it, when the FUCK are we going to learn these godforsaken monsters do not rehabilitate. To stop this cycle of evil against children, they should just be thrown into one big pit of 50 with enough food to feed 40. That'd take care of them, and society.
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Brett Affleck brings us a beauty today. A German newspaper "inadvertently" ran a 1/3 page advertisement for E.ON, a worldwide energy company, with a tag line that said, "The Gas of Tomorrow." Unfortunatley, a big story on the "the gas of yesterday", the Nazi extermination of European gypsies, was the other 2/3 of the page.
That just could not have been an accident. Those silly krauts...
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Now maybe I've been watching too much Sopranos, but if you chop a body into bits, there is an awful lot of blood sprayed around. Prosecutors contended this Dominatrix (remember, Sex Sells so we're gonna post a lotta Sex here) chopped a guy--eh hem, a client--up into bits after he had a heart attack during a 'session' (she must be good, eh?). But they found no forensic evidence and didn't videotape her alleged confession AND they kept no notes. This sounds like a tall tale to me. We do give the prosecutor a B+ for effort; he donned the black hood and feigned being tied to a some S&M equipment during the trial. I think he was just a little too comfy in that setting but whatever.
Justice was served!
Read the First MWB Post
MediaWatchblog turned one year old on January 26th, 2006. Oh I know, there were 4 billion blogs out there by then, and there are about 12 billion now (thanks to MySpace, eBlogger, and the like). But we have the absolute kewlest domain name, the two hottest chicks (Marla and Michela), and single hottest Ben Affleck twin (Brett, if he ever graduates from law school) powering this motor. AND, I think we're up to about 25 readers. Those juvenile MySpace blogs, like, I'm so sure! have 25 readers too, but they're all in Algebra class at 3 p.m. Marla and I are sipping pina coladas and nibbling bon bons delivered to us by the hot cabana boy from Northern Italy (where they actually bathe) by 3 p.m. So it's an entirely different demographic. Our first posts were, shall we say, a bit heavy. Then we realized that sex is what really sells ( click here to see more about sex) and besides, we've just been quite busy, haven't we Marla. It's hard working being a social flutter-by...
So Happy Birthday MediaWatchBlog! Not only are not even 29 yet, we've got 28 years to go and we've already had a facelift!
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What kind o' sissy gets his knickers all knotted up around his nuts just because a teacher made him sit on the floor for wearing a football jersey. Come ON now bro', show some Elway-style fortitude. Sit on that there floor and take yer damn quiz with pride for taking one for the team. And we didn't mean in the butt, either bro'. Don'tcha start shakin in yer shoes again...
Read all about it Hillbilly handed us words like "WhitewaterGate", and "TravelGate", and "MonicaGate", and "UgliestdaughterontheplanetGate" and she has the nerve to call this administration corrupt? Not only that, she has the nerve to stand in front of a church and call an administration with a Latino Attorney General, a black Secretary of State, and numerous others, a plantation? She has the audacity to say this administration failed the Katrina victims as billions and billions and billions pour into this area which was ultimiately failed by those responsible for its protection? And the sheep listening to this claptrap didn't ask her why Billary's entire cabinet was whiter than the folds of her fat ass, eh? Too bad.
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It's really unbelievable that there are not more headlines all over the place on how the NFL referees did everything but spike the Pittsburg gatorade jug with qualudes to hand Indianapolis this playoff game. There's a little talk hither and thither about the most ridiculous call ever made in NFL history (as in this article, the overturn of the interception), but there were numerous issues with the refereeing of this game. Bad ball placements, not calling penalties on Indy, and, in spite of all that, the Steelers still won. San Diegans all over rejoiced.
San Diegans may be a bunch of sun bleached, half-baked stoners with fewer brain cells left than an ameoba, but they never forget slight to the home team ( click here to read all about Peyton's punkass brother.)
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