Read all about it Junior Soprano's trial is just a bit too close to home. Can we spell

"j-u-r-y t-a-m-p-e-r-i-n-g"

kids?

Read all about it There's just no reason for a guy with a fraudulent resume to have passed any screenings for becoming the Chief of FEMA. Bush and his aides truly blew this one, a strong statement coming from someone who hates the left more than she hates flesh eating bacteria (actually, they're one in the same). So to give the pink ladies of the left any of their own ammo just pains MWB. But alas, unlike the pink ladies to the left of un-manicured left hands, we admit defeat more readily than the French army when we know we're wrong. And here, Bush was just plain wrong.

Read all about it The world has pointed their stinky little fingers at the US of A regarding this disaster. Los Angeles radio station KFI has people on site back east and they report that the foreign media (French, Italian, German) are putting mics in people's faces saying "Zow, vhere is zee blame? All zees deths und sahdness..." They can't help but relish in our disaster, since it happened during a Republican president's term. However, it looks like the "deths" will be few, very few. Fewer than the tens of thousands who perished in something as harmless as a heat wave in France. Not a hurricane, not a Tsunami, not an earthquake. But a heat wave. Read all about that one. I guess the pluck of the citizens of the US of A stands, doesn't it.

Marla and I were discussing the apparent and rampant trend for males and females to fall apart after 30, kids or no kids. Says Marla: "These people didn't just hit the wall, it looks like they hit the wall, went back through the wall, in fact, it looks like they're just going back and forth through the wall!" I haven't laughed so hard with a sore throat in all my life.

Read all about it MWB can't help but glow in the slow burn of the funeral pyre of the Raiders football team in the first game of the season (the treasured and rare Thursday night NFL game). They are proof positive that NFL teams cannot be bought. That screwball owners can screw-up the team. And that no matter what, MWB be Raider Haters (go Chargers)!

Read all about it In search of the reason Irish youth have been killing each other over a dark, freezing Island for 2000 years, Dublin researchers have found changes in teen brains that may cause all their troubles.

Read all about it An icon of my childhood, the mere mention of Gilligan's Island and the death of Bob Denver puts me in a certain mood. It sounds sappy but really I was kind of a bitchy little kid and I rememeber all the scraps and laughs we had, with GI re-runs playing in the background. Sis and I were bonded over this shit (Family Affair, Bewitched, Brady Bunch, Partridge Family, I dream of Jeannie, blah blah). Barbara Eden is gone, Elizabeth Montgomery is gone, Dick York is gone, Jonas Grumby is gone, Jim Backus is gone. They're just about all gone. When the Brady Kids start knocking off, it's all over! (The total wipeout of the Family Affair cast just doesn't count. They were dead before we thought about getting old.)

Read all about it With the final tallies still far off, with the rescues still taking place, with human beings displaced from their homes and still living in sports arenas, Hillbilly Hag Extraordinaire is calling for a 9-11 like probe of this disaster. First, there's no doubt there were huge issues with the response. But there's enough blame to go around. Plenty. Something the pink ladies of the liberal media are not discussing is that New Orleans didn't follow its own emergency evacuation procedures. Second, the citizens facing these dire conditions did not leave New Orleans when they should have. Third, when the hurricane veered away from New Orleans, it seemed the threat was gone. In a few short hours, the breaking of the levee changed that scenario dramatically and quickly. Fourth, much of the human suffering was caused by the animalistic behavior of the people who stayed behind (intentionally, you recall). These factors, much, much more than any of Bush's failings, are the primary reason the human suffering reached the extent that it did. And finally, BUSH is NOT the government. The government is a combination of local, state, and federal bodies which include Senates and Houses of Representatives. I do not recall seeing Hillbilly Hagariffic pontificating in front of TV Cams before her exploitation-of-the-moment light bulb went on. Does everyone forget how she lied about her hideously ugly daughter's not-so-close brush with 9-11 to gain sympathy? She's so hagariffic, I cannot even write these words without gaining 12 points in my blood pressure.

This big, botox-deep frown line goes out to all makers of all mobile telephones in the United States of America. The manufacturers are ignoring and continuing an evile design flaw which has surely destroyed lives. Yes, lives! That flaw is...! It is that in non-flip phones, "locking" the keys doesn't mean the keys are "locked." The phone can still be accidentally answered by the unwitting holder of the phone. It's evile! Consider a recent Dr. Laura phone call... the woman called to tell Dr. L that she had overheard her husband on a date with another woman. Worse, he complaining about his wife (her!) to this woman! Dr. Laura was quite puzzled. "How did you hear this?" The woman explained that she simply called her husband, and the phone answered (even though he did not say "hello?") and the line was held open for the entire date while the angry Mrs. listened. Dr. L just didn't understand how this could have been and only barely seemed to believe what the woman said but finally took it at face value. Ahh, MWB understands what happened. The keys were "locked." The phone was in his pocket, probably on silent. He probably shifted one millimeter to pick up his salad fork and voila! The phone answered! And NOW the goddamn cell phones keys are locked and so it doesn't disconnect, and his wife can hear everything. So I say, to hell will go the cell phone designers who allow this to continue. So I say, buyer beware! Especially those up to some nefarious behaviors... your cell phone in your briefcase, pocket, purse, or car can shift while it's ringing with keys locked and answer itself. Demand change! Call your provider!

Read all about it Baby Brett Affleck brings us an article and shame on FoxNews.com for not carrying this, but it does go to show that CNN doesn't have the lock and stock on leftwing whacknut leanings. A massacre in Walmart was averted by a legally purchased, registered, and concealed weapon carried by a law-abiding citizen. This man should get Man of the Year. This should have been BIG news. I guess the leftwing whacknuts only care when many children are murdered (it keeps the population down and serves their goal of eliminating humans from their prized planet earth).