Read all about it Kids are dying from self-suffocation, and the health department types are trying to convince us that we need to warn kids that they can die suffocating themselves. They gave the same warning over the kids dying from inhalants, and a particularly laughable quote came from an ex-inhalent user; "They never told me not to do this. They just warned me about drugs." Are they kidding? The most basic premise of survival is to breathe; a person who doesn't get that can't be warned. The warning itself would sound like Charlie Brown's teacher to such inconceivably judgement-free brains.

Read all about it Now, a truly interesting headline would be Quattrone Enjoying Prison Stay, Wishes Sentence was Longer The real headline is totally un-interesting.

Go buy the stuff That stuff is absolutely amazing! It has totally kept me blemish-free for months. Light-weight, and yet still keeps my slightly dry skin moisturized. With the SPF-45, I do not have to worry about shielding my beautiful, young skin from the sun while I drive around town with my sunroof open in F.B. (Fat Bastard; my second home on wheels, a Tahoe). I am trying other products in the line and my face is doing great (of course I had amazing skin to begin with but it is maintaining it perfectly). However, I can attest that I have seen a dramatic improvement in a less-fortunate co-worker's face since she started using the Epicuren products. At this time I give a "100%, this is the best stuff you'll ever use on your face" endorsement to Solar X-treme. One important thing to note, as this product contains propolis (basically sanitized bee vomit), so hon, you cannot use this product if you are allergic to bees or honey.

In the middle of the night Sunday (Monday morning at 3:45 a.m.), a freak accident caused a fire sprinkler head to break off and flood my city flat. It was the sprinkler in my place that broke, and being on the top floor, all homes below me also suffered incomprehensible flood damage. We're sort of back in biz here, the MWB server survived. The MWB writers survived. Nobody drowned (and there was no fire, in spite of the signal of the smoke detector that triggered this disaster).

For some reason the pansy media and the common folk around us continue to grant these satanically inspired homicidal maniacs the moniker of "suicide" bomber. This moniker gives them a sympathetic place in the world, right next to the intractably depressed and incurably ill. These homicidal maniacs do not have even one clipped pinky fingernail on the goal of suicide; they could jump of a bridge were this true. Their whole being, their entire existence, the sole goal and focus of their lives is not to die, but to murder, to commit homicide. Kudos to FoxNews for already doing it...the entire world must stand up and call them what they are. Maybe that would change the mind of those leftwing whores who dismiss their acts as noble or courageous, as Bill Maher once said of our 9/11 homicidal maniacs.

MWB doesn't have the political, social, or religious philosophy of the typical Londoner. And that's what makes our world a special one. When Westerners disagree, they usually do not go and bomb one another to bits. They debate. They argue. They vote. But they do not bomb. I was once advised by a friend to get an Irish passport. Since my ancestors are nearly all Irish, my father could get one, I could get one (incidentally, this turned out not to be true). We joked that I would never be a target of the hijackers with an Irish passport. That the middle eastern terrorists feel some kinship with the Irish, repressed as they are by the British, and the battle they have waged against them. I was bemused by this tidbit of the world, a world foreign to most Americans since we live in such a vast, vast place surrounded by food, shelter, all cultures, all religions. All the religions you could name in the whole world have a sect, group, congregation, mosque--we could go on for-eveerrrr--in the US. We don't think of the world in terms of who likes who; the slaughter in Serbia of one group by another, the hacking of life and limbs (literally) by one group on another, just totally foreign to us no matter what Jesse Jackson and his black Mafioso would say. I will never again grin slightly at the prospect of mano-a-mano with middle eastern terrorists. I will never again find it chuckle-worthy that they feel the Irish terrorists are cut from the same cloth, fighting the same good fight. The Irish terrorists who blew up so many people, shot them, bashed kneecaps off, and funded murder are not funny at all. That they could possibly have a kinship with middle-eastern homicidal maniacs is horrifying. I now throw them in the same stockpile; the one worthy of some gasoline and a match. I won't lie and say the US is some harmonious, prejudice free garden of invisible skin color Eden. No way. Yet even amongst the vilest of our racists, civility is the rule of the day. Our most dangerous places are not so because of religion, but poverty and the unchecked disintegration of families who take care of each other. The world is not a perfect place and the US is no exception. But the typical citizen, let's say well over 98% on a conservative estimate, would never agree with the murder of innocents on a subway to prove a point. Quite the opposite with the homicidal maniacs; quite the opposite. We sit here behind our PC monitors and our hearts go out to you. No matter what Britain did or didn't do, no matter how much we hate French people, no matter how two-faced and good-for-nothing we think the UN is, we would never bomb them, we would never murder innocent citizens to prove the point, and nobody, NOBODY, deserves to die in this way except the homicidal maniacs themselves.

Read all about it The Libs push a flavor of social engineering as addicting as anything found in a crack pipe. The ideals promise everything for everyone, an Earth in Nirvana, "balance" (their fave catch phrase), and harmony. Terrorists do not hurt people (unless they're totally provoked, and for no other reason), and 50% of the CEOs are women. How could anyone ever get enough of such an ideal world. Just forget that in the purest form, these ideals are the Lenins ("property is criminal!"), the Stalins (10,000,000 murdered), the Pol Pots (2-3,000,000 murdered), the Fidel Castros (enough said). When they pushed for MTB to be added to California gasoline, at any cost, they got to play both sides of the card when it polluted our drinking water..."See, we TOLD you gasoline was bad! Bad, bad! Bad gasoline!" And nary a peep that the leftists caused this pollution. And when they forced us to start adopting "clean energy" because power plants are "Bad! Bad Power Plants! Bad!", who knew... The implementation of those windmills have killed about 44,000 birds, including hundreds of Golden Eagles. Unfortunately, their talking heads are blaming the bird deaths on "improperly placed" windmills. How convenient. How blind...there is no impact-free way for human beings to live on this planet. Should we all just kill ourselves now? You'd like that, wouldn't you...

Two big smooches to the FoodSaver home vacuum pack machine thingie. We resisted owning one of these things because they are advertised and sold on late-night infomercials of the cheesiest variety. Someone gave us one of these home vacuum pack machine thingies for free, and speaking of cheese, it has saved our precious stock of cheese. For weeks now, it has perfectly preserved our parmesan, brie, gorgonzola, swiss, and our personal fave, the Fog cheese that works out to well over $40 a pound when the best of the best is bought (at Bristol Farms, soon-to-be MWB pick). We're doing an experiment with some crackers; we vacuum packed 6 of them and we're going to bury it on Marla's vast country estate. Results will not be announced in our lifetime (Marla and I would have to admit there is a passage of time and for us, there isn't. So there.). But you know those crackers will be edible in 20 years so get a FoodSaver for yourself and start vacuum packing everything you own. You'll love it!

Get them here My personal favorite? "The Koran, now in Two Ply" I hope they have an extra small. Marla will need one a little bigger, for two different reasons.

We liked the Batman movie. We loved Batman (played by Christian Bale), Michael Caine as the loyal British servant archetype, and Liam Neeson as the good and evil anti-hero. Katie Holmes? We hated her, and webarely realized she was the same silly little girl Tom Cruise drags all over the world. She is as believable in her sincerity as an actor on a Saturday morning tween TV show. She also has a bizarre way of speaking by only moving half of her mouth. We kept expecting the drool to slither out on that corner of her mouth, since it made her look like she has had a recent stroke. Maybe it's all those vitamins she's choking down, as a new "Scien"tologist. The movie was too long, but it was much more entertaining than any previous Batman movie and much MUCH more than Spiderman.