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April 03, 2007
Fabulous quote of the day
Everyone and anyone who knows me knows all about.... THE NOT-SO-FABULOUS FLOOD OF '05. The scene? One thousand gallons of water pouring in from the ceiling of a third floor apartment, and subsequently destroying said apartment and the two below it. The cause? A broken fire sprinkler that certainly should never have broken. The big deal? The Irvine Company went after Michela like a drunken frat boy on a bikini in Ft. Lauderdale when it was really caused by multiple Irvine Company equipment failures. The upshot? Their vicious bulldog dyke attorney scared the bezeejus out of Michela but in the end, those P-fers didn't get a dime and the only damage was that Michela was tossed onto the street when the lease was up, which seemed a fair trade-off for a several thousand dollar bill in repairs and hotels.
Therefore, when I heard the following quote from a source I cannot name, I laughed, having personally dealt with these bastards:
Dealing with the Irvine Company is like dealing with the Mob.
Michela seconds, thirds, and fourths this sentiment. The Irvine Company really does have a monopoly on commercial and multifamily real estate in Irvine, Tustin Ranch, and Newport beach. Let's not forget James Irvine was Irish; maybe the IRA is behind THE FAMILY. Well I just got a good laugh; prior to hearing my seriously sad tale, this person confirmed what Michela experienced first-hand.
Posted by Michela at 09:14 AM | Comments (0)
March 23, 2007
Fabulous quote of the day
Michela is again the source of a fantastic quip. My second this year! In discussing a certain pigheadedness of someone I may or may not work with...
If you try to milk a bull, all you get is bullshit.
If only you all knew how true this is!
Posted by Michela at 09:50 PM | Comments (6)
February 20, 2007
Absolutely Fabulous Quote of the Day
This quote is from Mz. Michela herself... out loud, in her litte car, driving down the road, listening to the media who just couldn't cough up enough spittle to kiss Hillbillies big fat ass if they tried even harder than they are now.
Dear God! I couldn't take another four years of a Bush or a Clinton or of a Clinton with a bush!
You heard it here first loyal MWB-ers! Beautiful babay! Beautiful!!!
Posted by Michela at 10:25 PM | Comments (0)
February 05, 2007
Fabulous Quote of the Day
This is from my radio program who is covering the massive travesty of justice, the Ignacio Ramos / Jose Compean case, The John & Ken Show, Ken Champeau:
Johnny Sutton could make your traffic ticket look like a murder case.
DEBRA KANOF YOU ARE A CUNT AND YOU WILL DIE OF CANCER OF THE EYES AND BURN IN HELL
JOHNNY SUTTON YOU ARE A SATANIC MONSTER -YOU WILL DIE OF CANCER OF THE ASSHOLE AND BURN IN HELL
GEORGE BUSH YOU ARE AN EVIL IDIOT AND YOU WILL BURN IN HELL WITH BOTH OF THEM
MARY BONO YOU ARE A CUNT AND YOU WILL ROT IN HELL WITH ALL THREE OF THEM
TONY SNOW YOU ARE AN INHUMAN MONSTER AND YOU WILL DIE OF CANCER OF YOUR ANUS AND FRY LIKE SUNDAY EGGS WITH THE OTHER FOUR
Posted by Michela at 05:27 PM | Comments (32)
November 22, 2006
Fabulous Quote of the Day
iGanja and I went to see Tommy and Shelby Chong at the Irvine Improv Friday night. And no, he did not launch into any N-word tirades. But he did give MWB our Fabulous Quote of the Day. It was roughly:
The government says that marijuana is and should be illegal because it makes you lazy and unmotivated. Now there's a reason to throw people in prison for 10 years! "You're lazy, and unmotivated. You're going to prison!"
And he's right...if we threw all the lazy and unmotivated people in this world into prison, why, only Marla, Michela, and iGanja would be left!
tee hee
Posted by Michela at 12:45 PM | Comments (2)
October 26, 2006
Fabulous quote of the day!
Unbelievably, I've seen three examples in the last two days of two-sided reporting on the CNN channel and CNN.com. I keep checking my pulse, and fortunately, it's still there. But given the shocking nature of such fairness by ardent socialist Ted Turner's network, it's amazing I'm not dead on the floor.
This piece is a response by Jim Gilchrist to an ingratiating opinion piece about the events at Columbia University where students successfully put a wet towel on a freedom of speech fire. They violently attacked Mr. Gilchrist and thereby prevented him from speaking; an infringment on free speech which, if committed by non-liberals, would have caused a media maelstrom not seen since Nixon's henchment broke into the Watergate Hotel. But since the violence was perpetrated against conservative speech, eh, eesss okay mayn.
But here is the fabulous quote in which Gilchrist challenges CNN.com readers to wonder whether they think for themselves, or they are led around by the media sheepherders:
The hope and belief of Navarrette and his fellow propagandist journalists, along with anti-American groups like those that disrupted my speech, is that readers are so simple-minded they cannot distinguish between truth and fiction. One can only hope that CNN.com readers are not so easily fooled.
Unfortunately, Mr. Gilcrhist, those who can already think for themselves agree with you. Too many sheep are following the anti-American sheepherders who are leading this Nation off the edge of a steep cliff. There is no sign of reason interceding before we hit the canyon floor. And most of our politicians are ready to follow the sheep right of the edge. Hopefully, Planet Michela will be ready for reasonable people to escape to when the freefall begins.
Posted by Michela at 10:14 AM | Comments (0)
October 02, 2006
Fabulous quote of the day
From Randall Warner, Republican farmer in Kansas:
Stick a Republican and a Democrat in a sack, shake it up, pour it out, and the same rapacious thing crawls out. Creatures from a smoke-filled room.
Posted by Michela at 08:55 AM | Comments (0)
September 15, 2006
There's the pot...there's the kettle...there's the pot calling the kettle black
Muslims are outraged at the Pope for calling some of the teachings of Islam's founder (Muhommad?) "evil and inhuman." Gee, what could he possibly have been talking about...those that demand death to the infidels? Those that demand that women are horribly oppressed? Those teachings? Hmm. Bad pope, bad! And to such an incorrect statement, the forward thinking Muslim community says:
And in Turkey, the ruling party likened the pontiff to Hitler and Mussolini and accused him of reviving the mentality of the Crusades.
Ah yes, the progressive nature of Islam is weary of a 'revival' of the 'mentality' of the Crusades. To which I say, man, you guys are waaaaaaaaaaayyyyy ahead of the Christians on that front; you've been beheading people and torturing and murdering people who do not follow in strict Islamic fundamentalist ways, even when those you torture and murder are Muslim because they're not Muslim enough... Sounds like the Crusades to me you whackos! Only difference is, our Crusades were 1,000 years ago; yours continues on this very day.
Now, if only the ruling party in Turkey would make similar proclamations against the barbaric behavior of Muslim terrorists...
Posted by Michela at 03:21 PM | Comments (0)
August 28, 2006
Whackadoo quote of the day
Read all about it
Got boobs?
"The breasts are so sexualized."
That's a statement that earns an award for the biggest "DUH!" Homer Simpson could muster. If you want to breast feed, in public, you can bet someone's gonna want to get a peek at your titties. Even I would. I don't know why. It's just the way it is. We love boobs. Straight chicks love boobs. Gay chicks love boobs even more. Straight guys think boobs are the best thing since putty tats. Gay guys...well, there's your exception honey. If you want to dine and breastfeed and not feel "sexualized", go to a gay bar and feed away. But be prepared to have a line of guys in coordinated clothing saying, "Eew!"
People loved boobies long before wine, beer, and Coors commercials with twins. So get used to it. Okay folks, let's get real...maybe "the breasts" are too sexualized. You be the judge.
Posted by Michela at 02:48 PM | Comments (46)
August 04, 2006
Absolutely Factual Quote of the Day
John Ziegler, talk show host on KFI, gives us a truism that the Nazi Collaborating Cheese Eating Surrender Monkeys (French) and the Nazis (Germans) would do well to understand, and remember what a short trip to 1939 we really are:
If the Middle East Muslims had no weapons, there would be no war. If the Israelis had no weapons, there would be no Israel.
For some reason the rest of the world has chosen to forget the Holocaust altogether and once again, unify against the Jewish community in a time of war.
An accurate comparison of the situation in the Middle East is as follows:
Let's say we took those pesky Minutemen the liberals love to hate; the volunteers who are helping our failing federal government defend and protect our borders. Let's say these pesky Minutemen started lobbing rockets and/or missiles into Mexico, for 2 years they do this. The world tells Mexico to pound sand. The pesky Minutemen relish in the negative publicity their victim, a sovereign nation, is receiving. They taunt Mexico even further by crossing the border into Mexico, kidnapping, torturing, and murdering two soldiers.
What should Mexico do? The world condemns them as they decide enough is enough and they attack the Minutemen. Then the US says, hey, wait a sec, you can't attack our country! Mexico says, well, you shouldn't protect and house an organization who lobs rockets and missiles into our country for TWO YEARS while you do nothing, then let those same animals brutally kidnap our soldiers.
And you know what? Mexico would have every right to come after us. THAT is the situation faced by Israel, THAT is why they must defend themselves to the death. We should not forget the horrifying religion of peace Israel is fighting--Islam—a religion that sanctions beatings to women who wear nail polish, stones people to death in this third millennium, a religion that justifies homicide bombings, the 9/11 attacks, beheadings, torture, murder, a religion that wishes to wipe the Infidels (anyone who is not an extreme Muslim fundamentalist) off the face of the earth. There isn’t a free country or place on this earth where Muslims run the show. Is that what we want for the world? Liberals wake up; hello!!!! you feminists, you’re the first to go if they take over!
Personally, I think they're all eating too much cat poop. Read all about it
Posted by Michela at 11:36 AM | Comments (22)
July 24, 2006
Whackadoo quote of the day
John Kerry, that moron of Masachusetts (only one of many) has given us today's whacakdoo quote:
"If I was president, this [conflict between Hezbollah and Israel] wouldn't have happened."
Really? John Kerry, mister lead mouth himself, could have personally intervened and brought peace to the Middle East? A feat no person nor president, not even the butt kissing peace-nic Jimmy Carter, has been able to accomplish? IS HE INSANE?
YES!
Posted by Michela at 01:49 PM | Comments (10)
June 14, 2006
Fabulous Quote of the day
Our fabulous quote of the day is from John Ziegler, read at www.JohnZiegler.com:
"The female figure is the greatest known evidence that there might be a God...but the female psyche is an indication that this God has a very sick sense of humor."
MWB couldn't agree more. As a mostly female website, the gals of MWB think most females are beautiful and witty; solid contributors to society. On the other hand, as our JRule points out, they can also be bitchy, haggish, angry, resentful, overly suspicious, nagging, and illogical Beelzebubs. And that's all at the same time! MWB gals agree males fall into four simple categories:
Category One: Hot guys. Definitely fuckable; the type you take home only after 1 a.m. and kick out by 3 a.m. as they are not built for, eh hem, conversation. Must be able to make a sandwich without waking you. Difficult task for Category Ones; they're not so smart, and the best thing they have going for them besides being fuckable is a pulse.
Category Two: Ugly guys. Not fuckable. MWB always prays these guys are super smart, say, like Billy Boy Gates. Otherwise, the best thing they have going for them period is a pulse.
Category Three: Hot guys, not fuckable. They are assholes. Cannot speak in complete sentences. Growl at the television frequently. Have broken several remote controls during the superbowl. These guys like hoochie mamas who wear t-shirts that say "GOT MILK?"
Category Four: Hot guys, fuckable, relationship worthy.
And that's it. See, again, chicks can be, all at once, in all the above categories and 50 more. Within the same day!
Posted by Michela at 12:57 PM | Comments (22)
June 08, 2006
Fabulous Quote of the day
From my friend JRule, regarding finding the right woman:
"You want to stay positive, efficient, warm, high confidence, hopeful."
But...
"It's like trying to remain pure of heart while dueling beelzebub."
Beelzebub indeed! When I hear of the hags my poor guy friends are forced to choose between, Beelzebub, Ice Queen, Anger Hangar, I just don't know what to say. But let me give it a shot...
MARLA AND MICHELA ARE THE CATCHES OF THE CENTURY!!!!
Posted by Michela at 11:18 AM | Comments (11)
May 30, 2006
Fabulous Quote of the Day
"Good thing they don't play with bowling balls!"
So says a sub-triple digit IQ'd teen sitting behind me at the baseball game this evening after a foul ball soared over our heads.
"If they did, we'd be dead right now!"
Honey, if they played with bowling balls, all the players would be dead right now. Let's not even talk about that silly wittle topic called "physics" either. It would give her a headache just to pronounce the word...
Posted by Michela at 11:03 PM | Comments (10)
May 18, 2006
Fabulous Quotes of the Day
Los Angeles radio host Bill Handel (and his news team) on KFI AM 640, on the break-up of Paul McCartney and his amputee wife, Heather Mills:
"Paul's friends knows why they are splitting, but Heather is stumped."
and
"Paul is taking the break-up well, but Heather is hopping mad."
and
"She won't have a leg to stand on in the divorce."
and
"Heather is so upset; she doesn't have anyone to lean on."
Mercy me, that's some funny shit!
Posted by Michela at 12:11 PM | Comments (2)
March 23, 2006
Whackadoo quote of the day--those damn frogs again
Since the frogs can't make anything worth a damn on their own, they have to steal the ideas and technology from American innovators. I hope Apple gives Frawnce the biggest Shaquile O'Neil middle finger they can find. Fuck the frogs; they can listen to their cassette players if they don't like it! I have a few in a drawer I could send their way...
To justify the proposterous idea that allowing competitors to have access to a technology paid for, developed, and refined by an absolutely fabulous company for free, the "Culture Minister" and some other communist dumbass come up with this laughable statement:
“When this [this being the theft of Apple's technology] happens, iTunes will have the French government to thank for making it possible to draw so many Internet users toward legal platforms."
Yah, we'll have the French to thank for eliminating the concept of patents, research and development, and competitive market forces. What that will leave us with is cassette players, dixie cups, and really bad French cars. And we WILL have the French to "thank."
Posted by Michela at 01:47 PM | Comments (7)
March 07, 2006
"Hell, even the termites had enough sense to evacuate!"
Marla gives us the Fabulous Quote of the Day...and she's spot on too! The termites had enough sense (and brains) to go to higher ground on Katrina contact. But not those looters! Not those dumb asses at the convention center! But dem termites, hoooo dawggie, not only did they survive, they're done BACK, and a fortnight sooner than mosta dem hu-mans, too!
Uh, the termites were so smart, I'm a little scared, maybe....
Posted by Michela at 08:18 PM | Comments (5)
December 09, 2005
Fabulous Quote of the Day
Read all about the Orange Line Crashes
Read all about the Deadly MLK Hospital
That's enough bathroom reading for a food poisoned bulemic. But the short story is that the Orange Line buses in Los Angeles crash a lot, and the Martin Luther King Hospital in Los Angeles kills a lot of people. Los Angeles talk show host Bill Handel, after the latest Orange Line crash, says:
"It's the new Arab curse...'May you go on the Orange Line and be taken to Martin Luther King Hospital when you crash!' "
Oh man, you gotta be familiar with both situations to just roll on the floor with a sideache.
Posted by Michela at 04:02 PM | Comments (1)
November 26, 2005
Whackadoo quote of the day
Former FEMA chief Michael Brown gives us our whackadoo quote of the day:
"Hurricane Katrina showed how bad disasters can be, and there's an incredible need for individuals and businesses to understand how important preparedness is."
And for FEMA, and the President of the United States, and Governors, and Mayors of towns sitting on the edge of complete and utter destruction. They, too, have an incredible need to understand how important preparedness is.
Posted by Michela at 08:17 AM | Comments (0)
September 30, 2005
Whackadoo quote of the day
Former Education Secretary William Bennett was trying to make some point, we think, but the only point made clear to us is the white-sheeted conehead he must be wearing when he rides around at night thinking up such utterly inconceivable nonsense.
"If you wanted to reduce crime, you could -- if that were your sole purpose -- you could abort every black baby in this country and your crime rate would go down.
That would be an impossibly ridiculous and morally reprehensible thing to do, but your crime rate would go down."
And our blood pressure would go down if we didn't have to roll our eyes and fall over backwards when idiots spew such drivel. Unfortunately, with the Bennett's of the world out there, that's as unlikely to happen as is his "impossibly ridiculous" (to say the least) proposal. As if, as IF it were even true were it to happen! I think if you aborted all white babies crime would also go down, as the 16-24 year-old teenage males (the vast majority of criminals) aged into senility. Crime would go down then, too.
Posted by Michela at 10:42 AM | Comments (3)
September 21, 2005
Whackadoo Quote of the Day
Guy Ritchie says that the scathing criticism of his latest god-awful movie doesn't bother him:
"...critics have been harsh all the way through my career but it doesn't affect me..."
Maybe that's why he does not learn from his mistakes. And uh, I think the critics started when not all the way at the beginning, but the day Madonna sucked the lifeblood out of him and wrecked his creativity. Danielle Steele could have written and directed a better Swept Away.
Posted by Michela at 08:21 AM | Comments (1)
September 09, 2005
Fabulous Quote of the Day
Marla and I were discussing the apparent and rampant trend for males and females to fall apart after 30, kids or no kids. Says Marla:
"These people didn't just hit the wall, it looks like they hit the wall, went back through the wall, in fact, it looks like they're just going back and forth through the wall!"
I haven't laughed so hard with a sore throat in all my life.
Posted by Michela at 09:00 AM | Comments (9)
August 31, 2005
Whackadoo quote of the day
Marla brings us Fucking...Fucking, Austria that is...
"Just this morning I had to tell an English lady who stopped by that there were no F---ing postcards."
Quote by a local guide in Fucking, Austria (pronounced "Fooking", you puritanical but dirty-minded Yanks).
Posted by Michela at 12:03 PM | Comments (3)