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# Thursday, December 08, 2005
Go see all about it Fellow software geek and blogger of the universe, Paul English, provides you with a way to bypass those ever-so-annoying computers who answer your calls with his "IVR Cheat Sheet." One of my favorite irritants are the new voice activated responses. "Press or say 1" the nice computer voice says. I hit 1. "I'm sorry, we did not understand your response." I hit 1 again. "I'm sorry, we did not understand your response. Please enter a valid response." I loudly say "ONE" as everyone in the store stares. "I'm sorry, we did not receive your entry in a timely manner. Please call again later." CLICK. It turns out if you have background noise, it goes into recognizing what you say. But whether you say or hit 1, it can't understand you. Screw you CITIBANK! Anyway, he runs down the list of these and other annoying computer phone responses, and how to get to an operator, including bizarre key combinations like #-1-4-4. Oh this guy is a saint.
Thursday, December 08, 2005 8:00:00 AM (Pacific Standard Time, UTC-08:00)  #    Comments [2] -
Word on the street
Thursday, December 08, 2005 4:28:32 PM (Pacific Standard Time, UTC-08:00)
The 0 is your friend...
Usually... it can get you to the operator, and THEY can forward you to the correct selection...

But some of these companies have caught on... making it entirely impossible to reach a real voice.

Kind of like talking to a woman... ;)
Thursday, December 08, 2005 5:06:52 PM (Pacific Standard Time, UTC-08:00)
Thanks for sharing-That’s the best collection of hacks ever!

One of my “favorite irritants” (scary choice of words, Michela) is the outsourced English-as-a-second-language attendants that are so pleased to read their script when you finally do reach a human being:

(with a lilting Hindi accent) “I understand that your DSL is not working and that you are going to take the first-born son of our CEO hostage until it’s fixed, and I apologize for the inconvenience. Can you please tell me what color is the light on your modem?”

I swear next time I’m going to say “puce”, and see how many supervisors they go through trying to figure that out.
tsls
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